am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
