I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Randomize
