Responsibility does not care about your dick.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
