my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
