So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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