Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
