Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
