Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
