did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
