he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
