i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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