Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
