i barfeds in our rink
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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