And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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