windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
