if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
