If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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