i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize
