The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize
