so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
