I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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