How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
and you fell through a lawn chair
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize