i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I think a kid would responsible me up
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
