i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
