we have pet lesbian snakes
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
