I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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