I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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