Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
