No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
