I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
