1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
COCAINE IS GR8
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
