You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
