if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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