I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
