Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
It's not a walk of shame if you run
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
