I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
