yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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