What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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