so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
