I wannas sexs uuuuu
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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