She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
