If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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