question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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