absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I need moral support for this bender
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize