I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
