im about as happy as oj after his trial
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
