at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
