winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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