I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
