just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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