I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
